


You Are In Love

by jenniferxprentiss



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Dont read if you love Will, F/F, Fluff, Mutual Pining, Pregnancy, Slow Burn, two badass bitches soft for eachother
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:46:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25371856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenniferxprentiss/pseuds/jenniferxprentiss
Summary: “and for once you let goof your fears and your ghostsone step, not much, but it said enough”Sometimes life doesn’t go the way you plan, and that’s alright, because sometimes you find love in all the places you thought you couldn’t.
Relationships: Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/Emily Prentiss
Comments: 52
Kudos: 182





	1. oh, shit

**Author's Note:**

> omg hi I’m so happy you’re reading this! 
> 
> I’ve worked so very hard on this and have created an entire universe for it, so I hope you enjoy it just as much as I do. thank you infinitely to everyone who has helped support this along the way, ily all <3

“Will, I’m pregnant.” 

JJ felt the familiar lump form in her throat, tears stinging at the corners of her eyes. She was in her office, blinds drawn and door shut, paperwork spread around her on the desk. Once the test had come up positive, she couldn’t focus on anything else, and Will was out of town for work again. 

“What’re you going to do about it?” 

She felt anger burning in the pit of her stomach, scared tears giving way to angry tears, dripping down her face silently. She couldn’t believe Will had asked her what she was going to do - like it didn’t take two people to get pregnant in the first place. 

“Me? What am I going to do? You’re the father! What are we going to do?” 

There was a long pause, Will letting out a sigh. JJ wanted to reach through the phone and slap him, or better yet, fly to wherever he was working and do it in person. She wasn’t even sure where he was anymore - it wasn’t the sort of thing she kept up with - and the thought of building a family on their rocky foundation brought a fresh wave of tears to her eyes. 

“Where…” JJ stopped to take a deep breath in a poor attempt to hide the thickness of emotion in her voice. “Where even are you right now?” 

“Louisiana.” 

His voice was tense and tight, serving only to anger JJ even more. She longed for the long lost part of their relationship where they could talk about anything and everything without a wall of awkward silence between them. 

“Of course.” 

“It’s the job. You were in Fresno just a few days ago, cher.” 

“It’s not the same.” JJ sighed, holding the office phone between her cheek and shoulder, fingers fiddling with a stack of pens she had made, frowning when they toppled over again. “It’s just not the same.” 

She could practically hear him rolling his eyes and pictured the annoyed, pinched expression Will was probably making. In a feeble attempt to change fate, JJ uncovered the pregnancy test, letting out a sad, breathy chuckle when it was still positive, little blue plus just as bright as it had been. 

“It’s not the same because you make more than me? What — what’s so funny?” 

“I just checked the test again like the little plus sign would disappear and save me from this fucking nightmare.” 

Her tone was laced with sadness and disappointment, covering the little white stick with post it notes again. She never cursed - a sign of exactly how upset she was - and Will let out a soft chuckle through the crackly line. He sounded so close and a million miles away all at the same time, and it made her heart clench again. 

“I don’t know what to tell you, cher. I know you want me to have all the answers but I don’t, I’m not even close to knowing.” 

They sat in silence for a moment, tears blurring JJ’s vision as she tried desperately to swallow her pain and anguish, back of her hand wiping at her eyes. Her mouth opened but she couldn’t speak for the lump of emotion and tears in her throat. 

“Okay. I have to go, Will. I uh, I just wanted to let you know.” 

“Thanks. I love you, cher.” 

JJ took a deep breath, chewing at her bottom lip in thought. Did she love him? Enough to start a family with him? She shook her head fingers still fidgeting with the now curled edge of the post it note. 

“You too.” 

She hung up the phone, slamming it into the base as the tears began to fall. JJ slumped forward, head in her hands, letting out ragged sobs. Her chest was tight, aching with the effort of her sobs. 

It felt like she had cried for hours before she ran out of tears, sniveling pathetically and dabbing at her face with a tissue. Her head was pounding from the tears, throat dry and hoarse. She was trying her best to gather herself to head home, her office engulfed in orange light as the sun set. 

There was a soft knock on her door that made JJ jump, frantically wiping at her face before the door creaked open. Emily peeked her head in, sliding through a small crack in the door and pushing it shut behind her, a soft frown on her lips. She was sure everyone had left hours ago, feeling a soft flush creep up her face in embarrassment. 

“Hey…” Emily made herself comfortable on the chair in front of JJ’s desk, frown still on her face as she studied JJ. “Are you okay? I heard you crying and I… I didn’t want to leave you alone.” 

A soft smile played on JJ’s lips, shaking her head softly despite her pounding headache. Stupid tears and stupid emotional headaches, though it didn’t compare to one tenth of the heartache she was feeling. 

“Yes.” JJ lied, her face crumpling, more tears spilling out with a shuddered breath. “No. No, I’m not okay.” 

Emily fidgeted with her hands, unsure of where to place them. Her heart ached for JJ, mind racing as she tried to figure out exactly what could be wrong. She settled for walking over to JJ and leaning down, wrapping her arms around JJ gently. 

“It’s okay. It’s alright, Jayje.” 

JJ couldn’t help the strangled sob she let out into Emily’s shoulder. Her hands clutched at Emily’s shoulders as sobs wracked her small frame, finally letting herself truly cry out all of the pain. 

At some point Emily sunk to her knees, arms still tightly wound around JJ, whispering calming words into her ear as she rubbed her back in her best attempt to be soothing and platonic. Her heart was aching at JJ’s pain, and she wanted to kill whoever made her this upset. Her mind floated to that cop JJ was dating - Will Lemonade or something - but she quickly put it out of mind. They were happy, as far as JJ had let on. 

JJ was sniveling now, face still buried in Emily’s shoulder. She felt ashamed, letting herself break down like that but it was Emily, and Emily was always her safe space. She let out a soft sigh, pulling back and wiping her face with her sleeve again, ignoring the makeup smearing into her ivory blouse. 

“Honey, it’s going to be alright.” 

“I don’t know that it will be, Em.” She stood, helping Emily up from the ground before grabbing her bag and phone, motioning in the direction of the door. “Walk our with me?” 

“Yeah, Jayje. Anything you need.”

They walked out of the building in silence, JJ still hiccuping and sniveling softly. Her arm was wound around Emily’s, walking into the rapidly setting sun. The sky was pink, casting them in a perfect light, and JJ felt her heart ache once more. 

“You never told me… what’s going on?” 

JJ took a deep breath, feeling tears prick at the corners of her eyes. She braced herself for the fallout, heart beating hard in her chest - so hard that she could hear the pounding in her ears. 

A beat of silence passed, Emily looking at her with an expression laced with concern and care, and the sight made JJ’s eyes fill with tears once again. She puffed her cheeks out, breathing out a long sigh before turning to Emily, lips pursed into an unreadable, tense line. 

“Emily, I’m…” JJ took a deep breath, eyes downcast. “I’m pregnant.” 

Oh, shit.


	2. Coffee At Midnight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JJ and Will get into a fight and Emily defends her. They hash out some of Emily’s past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI
> 
> Thank you to every single sweetheart who liked this, commented, messaged me on tumblr, and has asked about this story. Your response means more than you’ll ever know. I hope you enjoy this chapter and please review, if you feel so inclined! 
> 
> I’m putting a trigger warning for abortion in this chapter, but it’s just discussion and mention - only canon for Emily.

The silence between them was thick and full of unspoken questions, Emily’s expression blank and unreadable. JJ wanted to cry again, bottom lip ensnared between her teeth. She looked at Emily with a heartbreakingly sad expression, trying desperately to read her. 

After a moment, Emily let out a breathy chuckle, blinking rapidly in shock. She raised her eyebrows, cocking her head as she tried to read JJ’s expression and understand exactly why this was a sad thing. 

“I’m...wow, Jayje, that’s amazing!” When JJ’s expression contorted to one of sadness, Emily backtracked. “Or maybe it’s not? You’ve gotta let me in on what’s going on.” 

There was another awkward silence, JJ’s eyes downcast, shoulders quaking as she tried her best to will the tears away and force the lump out of her throat. She sighed, stuffing her hands into the pockets of her slacks before shrugging her shoulders. 

“Not here, not now.” 

“Okay, since wine is off the table… why don’t we go pick up some takeout and go back to mine?” 

Emily let her hand rest on the small of JJ’s back, guiding her towards the parking lot. There was no way she would let JJ drive in the emotional state she was in, her face still pinched in a mixture of sadness and anger. 

“You really don’t have to drive me.” 

Despite her words, JJ didn’t object to Emily opening the passenger door for her. She climbed in, fastening her seatbelt while Emily rounded the car. She flashed JJ a gentle smile - not one of pity or anger like JJ had expected - before starting the car. 

“I know.” 

Emily kept her tone light, fingers ghosting along the inside of JJ’s wrist like she always did when she was asking to hold her hand. She smiled when JJ turned her palm up, grasping Emily’s hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. 

They remained hand in hand the entire drive, the sky black before they pulled into Emily’s driveway. Her house was much larger than her apartment had been, several bedrooms on a semi-private piece of land. She was content there, with her cat and not knowing her neighbors, a goofy smile on her lips as they walked into the house. 

———————

They had settled in, Emily sprawled across the couch while JJ curled up in the chair, boxes of pizza stacked high on the coffee table. JJ had put off talking until they had eaten, Emily promptly ordering their favorite pizza - and enough to feed an army, at that. 

“So…” Emily trailed off, taking a moment to swallow before she set her plate on the boxes. “You need to explain.” 

“Explain what? I’m pregnant, you know how babies are made.” 

“Smart ass.” 

Emily rolled her eyes, shooting a pointed look at JJ. Her eyebrow was raised, studying JJ’s face for some sort of response. Unfortunately, they were both profilers and knew how to make their expressions unreadable. 

“Okay. Fine.” JJ sighed, rubbing her temples. “So, I called Will and told him that I’m pregnant and he asked me what I’m going to do about it. What I’m going to do, like I’m the only one who participated in getting pregnant!” 

A blind rage filled Emily, turning her stomach. She felt her pulse quicken and spots form in her vision - a tell that she was angry, not just upset. Will had been an ass to JJ since they got together a few years back, always making comment on her career and her choices. She really just didn’t like him, and that probably would never change. 

“Okay, wow, there’s a lot to unpack there. Did he uh, say anything else?” 

JJ shook her head, lips pursed into a fine line. He didn’t - but he said everything he needed to without words. He didn’t want kids - hell, she didn’t know if she even wanted children - but he couldn’t at least comfort her? Make her feel even a little better about the situation? 

“Alright, do you think him not saying anything else was a bad thing? Was he just shocked?” 

“I mean, it’s not a good thing. We uh, we talked a few weeks ago.” JJ let out another sigh, sounding ragged and tired. “He said kids weren’t on the table for us, because of our jobs. He loves work too much and I… don’t know about me. I love my job and I want to be a mom too, but I don’t know what to do.” 

“You don’t need to have every answer right now.” Emily shot JJ a comforting smile, her head leaning back into the plush pillowing of the couch. 

They were interrupted by the sharp ring of JJ’s phone - both groaning because they thought they would be called away to another case. JJ picked it up, her face contorting in anger as she let out a long sigh.

“Will.” 

Emily sat up, elbows resting on her knees as she listened intently. She studied JJ’s face as it changed - moving from confusion to anger to tears welling up in her eyes in a matter of seconds. Quietly, she made a motion for JJ to explain, head cocked. 

“No, Will, I’m not getting an abortion. That’s off the table.” 

She felt her heart begin to race at JJ’s words, stomach turning. Emily tried to swallow down the bile rising in her throat, staggering to the bathroom and promptly emptying her stomach into the toilet. She felt the telltale burn of tears spring to her eyes, willing herself to stop for a moment - today was JJ’s day, not hers. 

It had been so long since she had allowed herself to think of her own abortion all those years ago, and the feelings of shame and guilt and anguish hit her like a freight train. She sighed shakily, ignoring the niggling voice of guilt in the back of her mind - it was what was best at the time, she knew that in her rational mind - before splashing some water on her face, hands gripping the sink as she stared into the mirror. 

The reflection was a face Emily hadn’t seen in years - eyebrows furrowed together, mouth pursed into a thin line. She had tried for years to bury the feelings of shame and anguish, the anxiety she had felt, and all of it was rushing back to her again. But this wasn’t about her - this was JJ’s moment, and whatever she decided would be perfectly fine. 

Because she was her best friend. Because JJ was a capable adult. Because JJ was able to make her own choices, and Emily was going to be supportive because she loved her, she wanted nothing more for her than happiness. 

She left the bathroom, preparing herself for a fight when she heard JJ still arguing with Will. 

“No, that’s not happening. No, I can’t.” JJ was scrubbing her face with the sleeve of the oversized sweatshirt Emily had lent her. “I don’t want to talk about this. I don’t… I can’t think of that.” 

When she saw Emily enter, she looked up at her, brows knit together in confusion. A silent question - an ‘are you okay, please talk to me’. Emily shook her head, a not now, maybe later. 

“Listen, Will, I don’t really have any other words right now but I don’t know, I can’t tell you I’ll get an abortion…” 

Emily felt the familiar bubble of anger rising in her chest again, an anger she hadn’t felt in so long. She was usually so controlled with her emotions, measured out and carefully let out. She didn’t cry, she didn’t yell, but with Will? Will incited a rage in her that no one else ever had. 

With a sigh, she held out her hand for JJ’s phone, mouthing for her to hand it over, that she wanted to talk to Will. She took a breath, fingers wrapping around the phone - burying her disgust in the heart emojis beside Will’s name - before putting it to her face. 

“I don’t really know you, you’re too much of a ball licker to get to know your girlfriend’s friends, but you need to back the fuck up. You can’t just tell Jayje to get an abortion! It’s not your fucking body!” 

“You know what? I don’t think it’s your body either.” 

“It’s not! And it’s not my choice. It’s JJ’s choice, and I’ll hold her hand the entire time if that’s what she chooses. And if not? If she wants to keep your baby - god, poor fucking child to have you for a father. If she wants to keep the baby, I’ll hold her hand through that too. Because I’m not you - because I’m not a piece of shit.” 

Emily struggled to maintain her composure, eyes filling with tears once again. She pushed them away, heart pounding so loudly from adrenaline and emotion that she could hear it in her ears. 

“You sound like an angry person, Emily Prentiss. I hope your life gets a little better soon. Put Jayje back on the phone.” 

“No. She’s my best friend and I know her well enough to know she needs space right now. You guys can talk later.” 

She let out a huff, breath shaking, as she hung up the phone. Her lower lip trembled when she set the phone down on the table, adrenaline from their short conversation crashing into her as the tears threatened to spill over her eyelids. 

“Fuck, he’s such an ass.” Emily breathed out, tears leaking down her face. She hissed out a soft ‘fuck’, trying to laugh breathily to distract from the tears. 

“Hey now, he’s not that bad.” JJ offered, soft pout on her face. 

JJ looked on, concern etched into her face - Emily never showed emotion, even on the toughest of their cases. JJ wasn’t used to seeing Emily cry, not even after she had been stabbed, shot, or tortured. 

“It’s not Will… the abortion thing, it’s personal for me.” 

JJ nestled herself into Emily’s side, fingers trailing down the inside of her arm and tickling at her palm, soft smile creeping up on her lips when Emily grasped her hand. They sat in silence for a few moments, JJ’s head leaning on Emily’s shoulder, both teary eyed and trying to regain their composure. 

“Are you ready to talk about it? I won’t judge you. I would never judge you.” 

“Jayje…” Emily’s voice was soft, a broken ghost of her usual authoritative tone. “I was fifteen. I got pregnant - um, duh, you have to be pregnant to get an abortion. I was kicked out of my church, but he - my best friend, the, um, the dad if there had really been a baby - he held my hand the entire time. He convinced me to go back to church, with my head held high.” 

JJ was quiet, letting Emily have her moment to think and speak. She listened to her tone, shaky and carefully measured, taking the time to enunciate every word - a tell that she was trying her best not to cry. JJ squeezed her hand, nodding in encouragement for her to continue. 

“And I feel so much still, so much pain and anguish and guilt and fear… Fear of the unknown, wondering what my life would be like if I had kept my baby. The guilt keeps me up at night, sometimes. I’m good at compartmentalizing, at pushing things away and not feeling them, like they happened to someone else and not me.” 

JJ felt her heart clench at Emily’s words, so small and soft and far away. She rubbed her head into Emily’s shoulder, a soft smile on her lips when Emily rested her head on JJ’s own. They sat for a moment, JJ listening to Emily softly sniffle, before she took another deep breath. 

“I still feel so much, yes, but I want you to know something. God, Jayje, I could never judge you. I will never judge you - if you feel like this is something you need to do, I’m here. I’ll hold your hand the entire time, the entire way, and I’ll take care of you. You’re my best friend and I love you, and I just… sorry I got weird.”

“You didn’t. You couldn’t get weird, because we’re best friends and I’ll see your pain and your hurt and I’ll take some of it to get it off your back for a while.” 

JJ rubbed small circles in Emily’s back, lifting her head to turn and properly look at her best friend. Emily looked so wrecked and emotional, makeup tracked down her face, eyes red and swollen. 

“I’ll take your pain, and I’ll lessen the load. And I’ll take care of you always, because you’re not alone - you’re never alone when you have me.” 

At JJ’s words, Emily let out a hollow sob, hand squeezing tightly to JJ’s. She felt the tears come on stronger now, hunched over and trying her best to swallow her tears and broken cries. 

“I keep thinking. I keep thinking about it.” Emily let out a broken sob, free hand coming up to cover her mouth. “I keep thinking about the what if’s, the what could have been’s. I should be over it, I know it.” 

“You shouldn’t. You have the right to feel, the right to have your emotions and work through them.” 

JJ kept her voice soothing, thumb rubbing the back of Emily’s hand as she just let her cry. She knew that she probably hadn’t allowed herself to cry in a very long time, sobs shaking her small frame. In that moment, she looked so small and fragile - a stark contrast to the badass FBI agent everyone else saw. 

They stayed huddled together, hand in hand, until Emily had cried herself out. Her body was shivering, wracked with hiccuping dry sobs, face reddened and damp with the residue of her tears. JJ leaned her head on her shoulder again, dropping a soft kiss to the exposed skin there. 

“Are you ready for bed? We don’t have to talk anymore tonight, I know you’ve probably reached your emotional quota for the day.” 

“Yeah, uh…” Emily jumped up, wiping at her face with a tissue from the coffee table. “Sorry, I didn’t realize I had cried for that long. Fuck, this is so awkward.” 

JJ caught her by the wrist, standing and looking into Emily’s eyes purposefully. She hoped her expression conveyed everything she was feeling - the support, the love, and the pride, so very proud of Emily for coming forward with her secrets and letting her emotions out. 

“Hey, stop that. You’re so strong, you put everyone else before you. And yes, you compartmentalize, but you need to learn to let people in. I’m proud of you, you could never be a burden to me.” 

There was a moment of silence between them, Emily’s eyes narrowing as she studied JJ’s expression, searching for sincerity. She knew she was sincere, but couldn’t help herself, she needed to know - know that everything was okay between them still, that JJ didn’t judge her. 

“Stop, you’re going to make me cry again. I don’t fucking cry.” 

“No, you don’t cry, but maybe you should try it sometimes. It’s very cathartic.” 

They walked down the hall, Emily stopping at the guest room door as though JJ had never stayed the night at her house before. She made a little motion with her hand, sheepish smile on her face. 

“So uh, here’s the guest room… you know that already. Fuck, I’m being stupid.” Emily laughed at herself, a little bit of her usual light and fire returning to her eyes. “Anyways, I’ll be down the hall if you need anything?” 

“Yeah, thanks. Good night, Emily, I’m leaving the door open if that’s okay?” 

Emily turned, already halfway down the hallway, a soft smile playing on her lips. She nodded, head cocked as she looked at JJ, studied her face and the way she looked without makeup, uninhibited beauty. 

“Yeah, Jayje, you can leave the door open. Sleep tight, come find me if you need me?” 

She retreated down the hall, climbing into bed and turning her lamp out. Emily slept with her door open - come to think of it, most of the BAU slept with their doors open, that she knew of - turning onto her side and staring at the window across from her bed. It would be another sleepless night, she just knew it, emotions still racing as her brain worked overtime, thinking of all the possibilities - about herself, her would-be child, about JJ, about Will. 

A soft knock on the doorframe brought Emily from her thoughts, clicking her lamp on and sitting up in bed to look at JJ. She was leaning against the door, small blanket wrapped around her body, with the most pitiful expression Emily had ever seen. 

The sight of the blanket almost made her smile, the one JJ had claimed as her own when she first became friends with Emily. When she offered for JJ to take it home, JJ declined, saying that she would just have to keep coming over to see Sergio the cat and cuddle up with her favorite blanket. 

“Trouble sleeping?” Emily almost didn’t recognize her own voice, small and hoarse from the tears. “Me too.” 

“Can I sleep with you?” 

Wordlessly, Emily laid back down, lifting the blanket for JJ to climb in. She smiled, nearly laughing out loud at the way JJ launched herself into the bed and crawling under the blankets, a pleased smile on her face. 

JJ wrapped around her body, hand clutching at Emily’s tee and head resting on her chest. They were both grinning stupidly - the way they always did when they stayed up too late watching horror movies but were too scared to sleep alone. 

“Good night, Jayje.” 

Emily felt her eyes fluttering shut against her will, nose buried in JJ’s soft hair. She yawned, wrapping and arm around JJ and squeezing gently, finally starting to drift to sleep in JJ’s embrace. 

“Night, Em. Thank you for letting me in tonight - you’re the strongest woman I know.” 

She tried to fight sleep to respond, but her body felt too heavy with exhaustion, unable to will herself to speak. Emily settled for a soft sigh, one hand threading in JJ’s hair as they both drifted off to sleep.


	3. And At Every Table, I’ll Save You A Seat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chap tonight, but earlier so y’all can read it! 
> 
> Waking up after they spend all night cuddling, and JJ’s relationship with Will meets a roadblock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hi there! Thank you for reading this, because it really means a lot. I absolutely love this entire universe, and I’m so excited to continue to write more for this. 
> 
> As always, I really appreciate reviews if you feel so inclined to leave them, either here or on my tumblr (jenniferxprentiss), where I post random HCs and moodboards for this universe too!

For once, the shrill sound of the alarm on the bedside table woke Emily before the sunlight did, usually up hours before her alarm was due to go off. She was comfortable, eyes bleary as she slapped the alarm clock. It had been so long since she was able to sleep in - she blamed it on the crying the night before and not the warm body barnacled to her chest. 

Warm body barnacled to her chest - oh, shit. 

Emily’s face was buried in JJ’s hair, arms still tightly wound around her as JJ was sprawled out over her. Her face was pinched, like she was trying not to wake up, the alarm clock having clearly woken them both from a restful sleep. 

“Ugh, what time is it?” JJ mumbled, lips against Emily’s collarbone. 

A blush crept up on Emily’s face, heating up her cheeks and chest. She tried to hide it in a cough, rubbing at her face. JJ’s face was so soft, so open, her blue eyes practically sparkling in the morning light. 

“Uh, about nine? I haven’t really ever slept long enough for my alarm to sound.” 

“Because your bed is lonely and cold.” 

Emily laughed, strained and half hearted because it was true, she just wouldn’t admit it. She kicked the covers off of them, nearly pulling them back up at JJ’s sad, soft pout. 

“Oh come on, you know we need to get into the office today. Up with you, go.” 

Emily playfully shoved JJ off of her, propping herself up on her elbows as she watched JJ walk to the door and stop, leaning on the doorframe again. Seriously, what was it with that woman and leaning in doorways. 

“My stuff’s still down the hall, yeah?” 

She nodded, unable to speak. Her eyes were trained on JJ, the way the sweater hung down just low enough that Emily could barely make out the sleep shorts under it. Her hair was tousled, eyes shining brightly as she looked over at Emily with a goofy grin. Emily tried to ignore the flush creeping up on her cheeks, the way her heart was pounding at just the sight of JJ - and god, in that moment she hated Will Laryngitis even more for ever making JJ feel inadequate. 

“You okay?” 

“Yeah!” Emily rushed out, ignoring her heart pounding in her chest. “Yeah, I’m good. Your stuff is still in the bathroom, yeah - why don’t you get washed up while I grab you some clean clothes and start on breakfast?” 

“Yeah.” JJ smiled, pushing off of the doorframe and walking backwards for a few paces. “Thanks for cuddling me.” 

“Thanks for uh, being so cuddly?” 

“Okay, I’m going now.” 

The light lilt of JJ’s laugh got quieter as she retreated down the hall, hair bouncing as she half skipped away. Emily’s heart was still racing - she blamed it on the sheer fact that she hadn’t had company in her bed in quite some time, and not who the company had been. 

She busied herself with finding them clothes to wear to work - selecting a blue dress she rarely wore for JJ, paired with a blazer, not wanting anyone to ask any questions as to why JJ was wearing her clothing. The thought of JJ in her clothes made her smirk - they were best friends, she’s certainly wore her fair share of JJ’s clothing after waking up on her couch, passed out after a long night of drinking. 

Walking down the hall, the faint sound of water and JJ’s humming brought a smile to Emily’s face. She stood outside the bathroom door, the small pile of clothing in her hand as she just listened, the soft murmur of her voice nearly drowned out by the running water. 

She was broken from her thoughts when JJ let out a small cough, nearly dropping the small pile in her hands. Emily let out a shaky laugh at her own antics before laying the pile on the floor outside the door, knocking gently so not to startle JJ. 

“Hey, I’m leaving you some clothes out here. Feel free to go use my bathroom if you need to use my makeup or anything.” 

“Thanks, Em.” 

Emily sauntered down the hall, smile so bright her cheeks were burning. She could hear the shy smile in JJ’s words, knowing exactly what her face looked like in that moment. 

In a feeble attempt to distract herself from thinking of JJ in the shower, singing and fully of shy smiles, she started the coffee machine up and got to work on their breakfast. She wrapped her favorite apron around her waist, tying it before she set about measuring out the ingredients for their pancakes. 

Emily danced around the kitchen, humming to the song on the radio - a Taylor Swift song she absolutely loved but wouldn’t tell anyone about, just knowing the team would have a field day with her if they knew. She twirled around, apron and nightgown lending to the domestic fantasy she allowed herself to think about only in the most private moments, while she was cooking or cleaning and singing along to the radio. 

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue.   
All's well that ends well to end up with you.   
Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover.   
And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me.   
And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover. 

There was a rustling in the doorway of the kitchen, Emily turning around and locking eyes with JJ, a crimson flush burning on her cheeks. She nearly dropped her spatula, eyes raking over JJ’s body. 

She looked absolutely gorgeous in that dress, the blue making her eyes shine impossibly brighter. Her lips were curved up in the ghost of a small smile, eyes warm and inviting. Emily felt her heart clench - blamed it on hormones the way it made her ache to see JJ in her clothing - before letting out a shaky laugh. 

“You weren’t supposed to see that.” 

JJ seated herself on a stool at the breakfast bar, elbows resting on the countertop and face propped up by her hand. Her smile was wide, eyes sparkling as she stared at Emily. She didn’t say a word, just watching her and nodding slightly, encouraging her to continue. 

The last bars of the song faded away and Emily turned the radio down a few notches, plating the last pancakes and sliding the stack in front of JJ. She was trying her best to contain her blush and her embarrassment, face still flushed and chewing on her bottom lip. 

“Stop.” JJ‘s voice was soft, just a hint of playfulness behind it. “I like seeing this side of you.” 

“I’m going to ignore the fact that you said that and pour our coffee now.” 

Emily was laughing at herself, pouring two mugs of coffee from the carafe and mixing them the way they both liked - lots of sugar and a little bit of creamer, enough to make the rest of the team laugh at them while they linked pinkies and smiled goofily at each other. The thought brought a dumb smirk to Emily’s face, sliding the mug across the bar to JJ and sitting beside her. 

“You don’t have to make me breakfast.” 

“I know. I wanted to, is that a crime?” 

“Yes. You’re an unsub now.” 

They both laughed, hysterical peals of laughter as they dig into their breakfast, forks bumping and clanging together on the same plate. 

————————

It had been a long day, and JJ was a little more than excited to get home and kick up her feet, absolutely nothing to do. She pulled into her driveway, stifling a yawn - it had been a long day of paperwork and local cases, and she honestly couldn’t wait to get back in the air and off to another big case. 

Her stomach flopped at the thought of having to talk to Will after their non-fight last night. Before she crawled into bed with Emily, she had sent him a text - if he couldn’t accept that she didn’t want an abortion, she was leaving. It made her chuckle, a small breathy laugh under her breath, that she worked for the FBI and stared death in the face on a regular basis, but talking to her boyfriend made her nauseous at times. 

JJ took the front steps two at a time, digging her keys out of her purse and pressing the key into the lock. It didn’t even jiggle. She frowned, eyes narrowing as she really looked at the lock, letting out a hissed curse. 

Fucking Will. 

He had changed the locks at some point between their conversation and now. She wanted to cry, running her hand through her hair, loose and messy, before she noticed a note under the mat. 

JJ,   
I hate to do this, but there’s really no choice. I can’t force you to get an abortion, and you can’t force me to stay with you. Your clothing is in the garage, we can arrange for you to pick up the rest of your belongings later. Let me know if you reconsider.   
All the best,   
Will. 

Hot, angry tears dripped down her face, fingers clutching at the paper so hard it wrinkled. She tried to exhale, breath shaking as she withdrew her keys from the door and walked down the steps, head down as she tried her best not to cry. 

She pulled out her phone, dialing the first number that came to mind - Emily. Of all people, of all of her friends, she knew Emily would judge her the least. She picked up on the second ring, quietly, listening to JJ’s ragged breathing laced with wet tears. 

“Jayje? Is everything okay?” 

“No…” She let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, choking back a sob. “I need you. I don’t know what to do. Will changed the fucking locks.” 

“He did what?!” Emily paused, and JJ could make out the faint jingle of her keys. “Stay right there, don’t move. I’m coming, I’m on my way. Fifteen minutes, Jayje. Will you be okay for fifteen minutes?” 

She nodded, letting out a watery laugh at the fact that Emily couldn’t see her. There was a mechanical noise, then the sound of Emily’s car starting and the engine revving. 

“Yeah, I’ll be okay. I’m going to… he left my clothes in the garage. He said uh, he said I can get the rest of my things another time.” 

Emily made a soft hum, and JJ knew she was speeding and trying to concentrate. She opened the garage, choking back another sob at the sight of her clothing thrown into garbage bags, sitting in the middle of the garage. 

“I don’t know what I’m going to do, Emily.” 

“What the fuck do you mean? You don’t know what you’re going to do? You’re staying with me and that’s final. You don’t impose on anything, you’re my best fucking friend.” Emily let out a long sigh, and JJ could hear her manicured fingernails tapping on the steering wheel anxiously. “Tell me you’ll at least consider it?” 

“Yeah, Em. I’ll consider it.” 

The call immediately dropped as Emily’s car screeched to a stop in front of the house. She jumped out, leaving the door open and lights on, running over to JJ and wrapping her arms around her. 

Only then did JJ allow herself to break down, in Emily’s arms for the third time in two days. She sobbed brokenly into Emily’s shoulder, hands coming up to clutch at her back as sobs wracked her body. 

“Oh, Jayje.” Emily whispered, arms tightening around her. “It’s alright, it’s going to be okay. We’ll figure it out.” 

“It doesn’t feel okay.” JJ sniffled, pulling back from Emily’s embrace, hand motioning to the garage. “It looks like he packed most of my stuff but uh, I need to come back for the rest that’s inside. I don’t know what to do, where to put it all.” 

“We’ll put in my house, I have next to no furniture anyways. I want you to feel at home, however long you stay.” Emily tossed a bag into the back of JJ’s car before walking to get more. “Just so you know, I wouldn’t object to you staying permanently.” 

JJ shook her head, a small smile ghosting over her lips. Emily always knew how to make things infinitely better, bringing a smile to her face in the darkest times - whether that be through heartbreak, or after getting beaten up by an unsub. 

“I don’t want to impose, really, but I appreciate it.” 

“You aren’t imposing if I offer.” Emily pointed out, eyebrow raised as she continued to load bags into JJ’s car. 

Her car was still sitting in the street abandoned, lights on and door still flung open. The sight made JJ’s heart clench, the amount that Emily cared for her touching her soul. She watched on as Emily finished loading the cars, stopping to swiftly kick the bumper of Will’s car, both women breaking out into hysterical giggles. 

When they calmed down what felt like hours later, JJ doubled over with laughter, they both straightened up and walked towards their cars. JJ closed her trunk, offering Emily a shy smile, hands stuffed in her pockets before she spoke. 

“Then if it’s not imposing, let’s go home.” 

“Yeah, Jayje, let’s go home.” 

Emily had to turn away before JJ saw the ridiculously wide smile she couldn’t stifle away, and despite the situation, JJ wore a matching smile too.


	4. Bang!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JJ is settling in with Emily, ingrained as part of her household in less than a week’s time. All’s well that ends well, or is it? 
> 
> Read as: Will’s back!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> First off, thanks for reading and reviewing, it means more than you’ll ever know!
> 
> This chapter contains a small nsfw-ish part, but nothing is described at all! 
> 
> Second, if you want to listen to the song that’s kind of the theme for this chapter - the end (and title) are Bang! by AJR, and the beginning is set to Sunday Candy (the Chance the Rapper version).
> 
> Read and review - and enjoy!

The birds chirping outside woke Emily before her alarm and she narrowed her eyes in disgust - stupid birds wrecking her peaceful morning. She tightened her arms around the warm body pressed into her side, nose burying in JJ’s hair and inhaling. 

She smelled like lavender and dogwood - the shampoo of Emily’s she had claimed as her own because it smelled better than her own. Emily couldn’t help but smile every time she smelled it, her heart quickening at the thought of JJ using her things - or were they their things now? 

In the week JJ had been living with her - staying with her, as JJ put it - Emily had woken up to the blonde in her bed almost every morning. She always claimed that the guest room that they were in the process of turning into her bedroom was too scary, she couldn’t sleep alone - inevitably crawling into bed with Emily after midnight. 

“Mm, morning.” JJ smiled up at her, blue eyes shining brightly. She stretched, yawning softly before resting her head on Emily’s shoulder, clearly with no plans to get up. 

“Good morning, Jayje. Couldn’t sleep?” 

“No. I like your bed better.” 

Emily smiled, burying her face in JJ’s hair again. They laid there, content to just soak in the lazy morning warmth before they had to get up for the day and face the world. It was quickly becoming a sort of routine for them, laying in bed and just existing before they had to drag out of bed, cold and shivering and fighting for the shower. 

“Thanks for letting me stay here.” 

She said this every morning, and every morning Emily smiled, ghosting a hand down JJ’s spine and pressed a soft kiss to her hair. Emily never wanted JJ to feel like a burden, like she wanted her anywhere else but here with her. It was like the best sleepover with her best friend every single day. 

“You don’t have to thank me. I’m happy you’re here. Would I lie to you?” 

“No.” 

“Then it’s fine, okay? Everything’s okay and you’re not imposing.” 

JJ let out a happy sound at Emily’s words, unable to fight the fluttering of her eyelids. Emily was truly the best cuddles, and with her head on her chest, JJ found herself lulled to sleep almost every night just from the sound of her heartbeat. 

“We need to get up.” 

At Emily’s words, JJ let out a low whine, her hand ghosting over her barely there bump and snuggling further into Emily’s chest. If they were given the opportunity, they’d stay in bed until afternoon. 

“I don’t wanna.” 

Emily laughed, burying her nose in JJ’s hair, trying to force herself to get up. She would gladly stay with JJ all day, but they had work and responsibilities. She rolled out from under JJ and off of the bed, watched her as she curled into a small ball under the blankets. 

“Come on, up with you. I’ll let you take the first shower?” 

With that, JJ was flying out of the room and down the hall, making Emily chuckle under her breath. They always fought over the shower in the mornings, having laid in bed for too long to be able to wait for the water to warm up again. 

Emily shook her head, soft smile creeping onto her face when she heard JJ clamber into the shower. She never thought she’d be so happy having someone else live with her - solitude was always her thing, never even sharing a hotel room if she could help it at all - but somehow JJ just wormed her way right in. 

She walked down the hall to prepare their breakfast, as she usually did when JJ got the shower first - which she usually did. Emily heard the faintest sound, a soft sigh coming from the bathroom and she froze outside the door, straining to hear if JJ was okay. 

If Will Lamayonnaise made her cry again, Emily was going to seriously lose her cool. 

There was another breathy sound from the bathroom and Emily almost pushed her way in until she realized — oh. JJ wasn’t crying, her sighs were giving way to soft, breathy moans. 

Emily felt heat rising to her face as she struggled with what to do. She knew it was impolite to stay and listen, but god, she wanted to more than anything - and it had been so long since she had touched herself, never feeling right about it with JJ beside her. 

She bit back a whine when she felt wetness flood her panties at the sound of JJ’s moans and whimpers, internally cursing her curiosity for pressing her ear to the door to begin with. 

When JJ came with a low moan of Emily’s name, she nearly combusted in place, promising herself to take an extra long shower before work. 

———————

There had been virtually no tension between them the rest of the day, though that wasn’t a shock. JJ didn’t know that Emily knew, and Emily didn’t want to confess to knowing because god, what kind of pervert stands outside of the door and listens to their best friend masturbate? 

Emily could hardly focus on her mountain of paperwork, JJ’s breathy moans echoing in her brain. Her panties were long past ruined, and she had fucked herself twice in the shower that morning, emerging flushed and jittery. She wanted to tear her hair out all day, and it didn’t help that JJ was wearing her blazer. 

JJ looked beautiful today - she looked beautiful every day, but the glow and happy flush on her face made her look exceptional. Emily felt her face heating up with a blush as she watched JJ work, the cap of her pen ensnared between her lips as she scrawled something on her page, looking up and locking eyes. 

She smiled at Emily, a small confused glint to her eyes behind her radiant smile. JJ turned away from Morgan, punching him in the shoulder and letting out a bellowing laugh, and focusing more on Emily, her eyes narrowing as she cocked her head. 

Emily wasn’t sure if she wanted to die or hide. Simply put, JJ was exceptional and turned her heart to mush whenever she was around her, the ever burning fire in her eyes only serving to melt Emily’s heart even more. 

Fuck, Emily was not falling for her pregnant best friend. She couldn’t be. 

She was broken from her thoughts when the door banged open, a man staggering in and hollering about something. The voice sounded familiar and Emily turned around, eyes locking on a familiar head of brown hair, stumbling in wearing a rumpled uniform, probably from the night before. 

Fucking Will Lemon Train. 

Emily stood, striding across the room and standing nearly nose to nose with him. She could smell the beer and liquor on his breath mixed with the telltale stench of vomit. She wanted to let her emotions and anger get the better of her, but she steeled herself for a fight, arms folded across her chest. 

“Will.” 

“Where is JJ? Cher! Cher? I jus’ wanna talk.” 

“You’re not talking to her right now. You’re drunk, you need to go home, Will.” 

The telltale bubble of rage filled Emily’s chest, her heart pounding and hands shaking. She tried her best to keep her tone calm and steady, to ignore the shake in her voice. His face contorted in anger and Emily wanted to spit - to kick him for making JJ feel even an ounce of as awful as he did, and then coming into her workplace drunk? She would have a field day with him if no one else was around. 

“I’m not goin’ home, it’s lonely without her.” He shouldered Emily, trying to step past her to get to JJ. “Cher, I’ve thought about it and I don’t want you to do that. I want you to come home - come back.” 

JJ looked downright terrified and Emily stepped between them again, hands settling on her hips in a challenge. She felt her body quake with adrenaline and anger, trying her best to will herself to stop. 

“You don’t get to come between us.” 

“And you don’t get to walk in here being like...like this!” 

Will’s arm flew up towards Emily’s face and she caught it a split second before it connected with the side of her head. She heard JJ gasp, jumping up from her chair and starting over to them but Emily threw up a hand, a sign to stop and stay where she was. She didn’t want her thrown in the middle of them if it got physical. 

“Don’t you ever fucking hit me.” 

He was silent, dropping his arm back to his side, staring at JJ before quickly bringing his fist up and swinging towards Emily’s chest. Thankfully he was inebriated and not as sharp, Emily catching his hand again. He shook his hand in an attempt to shake her off, wanting to try and get another swing in. 

“You fucking bastard! Stop! You’re insane, stop!” 

Without thinking, Emily brought her fist up, wincing when it connected with Will’s cheek. There was a sickening crack, his body falling limp to the floor as she held her hand, fist aching and burning. The sound of JJ’s panicked scream brought Emily out of her adrenaline-hazed state, eyes widening as she took in what just happened. 

Oh, shit. She really just punched Will Maggot Brain.


	5. Not In The Same Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath - a few hours after Emily punches Will. Emily has a surprise confession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> This chapter is set to Not In The Same Way by 5sos. It’s a short chapter tonight full of dialogue but I really wanted to put some content out tonight.   
> Let me know if you like it, yeah?

The night was calm and the house was dark and lonely, not even the sound of wind rustling to break Emily from her thoughts. She was huddled on the couch with JJ’s favorite blanket wrapped around her, bottle of wine in her hand, fingers wrapped around the neck of the bottle gingerly. 

She had sent JJ approximately twenty messages apologizing for hitting Will, only to be met with a short response - that she understood, and she’d be home soon. 

Fresh tears welled up in her eyes when she thought about the fact that JJ essentially took that idiot’s side, following the ambulance down to the hospital. It had been hours and she still wasn’t home - they were probably making up or planning their life together, for all Emily knew. 

She was well past drunk now and didn’t care one bit, lifting the bottle to her mouth and taking a long pull of her wine. It was all she could do not to cry - the last thing she wanted was for JJ to hate her, she was only trying to defend her. 

The soft sound of key in the lock made Emily straighten up, using the blanket to scrub at her face in a poor attempt to hide the tears. She settled the mostly empty bottle of wine on the floor, feet tucked up under her as she stared at the door, waiting for JJ to come in. 

“Emily.” 

JJ’s tone was tense and it brought another wave of tears to Emily’s eyes. She tried to hide it in a wobbly, watery laugh but couldn’t, a few tears stubbornly striking down her face. 

“You’ve been drinking.” It was a statement, an observation. 

Emily nodded carefully, lips pressed into a thin line. She refused to cry any more than she already had, willing her eyes to dry up. She knew she looked destroyed, hair messy and her face puffy and red from the tears. 

“I’m not going into work tomorrow.” Emily’s voice was flat but it shook, betraying the nonchalant tone she was aiming for. 

“What were you thinking, Emily?” JJ sighed, tucking herself into the armchair and looking at Emily with an unreadable expression. 

That was a loaded question - what was she thinking? There hadn’t really been a thought process. When Will started swinging his arms, drunk and belligerent, Emily was nearly paralyzed with fear - not for herself, but for JJ. She was so terrified he would hit her, she didn’t think, only acted. 

She never thought it would make JJ so mad - she was only trying to defend her. 

“I wasn’t thinking. I… I thought he was going to hurt you. It was just a response.” Emily shrugged her shoulders, her voice and expression far away. “I don’t like confrontation like that, especially unarmed. I didn’t mean to, I just wanted you to be safe.” 

The way Emily’s voice broke and sounded so small made JJ’s heart clench. She stood, moving to the couch and sitting down beside Emily, looking into her eyes that were swimming with emotion. 

“Em, I’m okay. Will, on the other hand… I convinced him not to press charges.” 

“Thank you.” Her voice was barely a whisper, hands fidgeting in her lap. 

“I’m upset with you. I don’t want to say mad, I’m just… upset.” 

Emily nodded. She knew. She knew from the way JJ pushed her away from Will and screamed, from the way Garcia had to escort her to her car with the promise to scrub the surveillance tapes. More tears leaked down her face at the thought of causing problems for JJ - the thought of making her upset was so soul crushing and devastating. 

“I just needed you to comfort me and you — you’re drunk.” 

“S’okay Jayje, I’ve got you. I’ve always got you.” 

Silence seemed to be the mood for the night, another awkward pause falling over them. The disappointment in JJ’s eyes was enough to make Emily want to cry. It affected her more than when her mother or Hotch looked at her like that and she wasn’t quite sure why - it made her want to defend herself and cry, to curl up in a ball and apologize. 

“I — Jayje… I didn’t think I would actually hit him?” 

“You thought you’d what? Pretend hit him?” 

There was a tense silence between them for a moment before JJ broke out into hysterical giggles, hand over her face. Emily joined her soon after, watery chuckles turning to full belly laughs. JJ was still one of the only people who could get her to laugh like this - loud and unrestrained. 

They stayed that way for a while, both laughing hysterically, JJ leaning on Emily’s shoulder as they both gasped for air. 

It took what felt like hours to calm down, Emily’s cheeks genuinely hurting from how wide her smile had been. She scrubbed her hand over her face again, wrapping an arm around JJ as she turned to look at her. 

“I’m drunk.” 

“You’re drunk.” 

“And you’re mad at me.” 

“Upset with you.” 

JJ’s expression softened, running a hand through Emily’s tangled hair. She wanted to laugh again, the way Emily was looking at her like a kicked puppy, but it made her heart clench too much to laugh. 

“Okay, I’m not that upset.” 

“Thank you.” 

“Let’s lighten the mood, yeah?” 

Emily nodded, bottom lip ensnared between her teeth. She wasn’t drunk enough to forget the next morning, but tipsy enough to blame anything she said on the liquor if there had been an unsavory response. She sighed, leaning her head back into the pillowy couch before letting out a small chuckle. 

“I have a confession.” 

JJ’s blue eyes were wide and sparkling, and Emily had to physically look away before she was entranced by them. She could fall into her eyes and admit anything - it had always been like that, from the first time she met her. 

“I heard you in the shower this morning, Jayje.” 

“I’m so sorry, I just —“ 

Emily held up a finger, silencing JJ’s apology. She shook her head, reaching down to take another long pull from her bottle of wine. She wore a coy smile on her face, lips quirked up. 

“No, you don’t need to be sorry. It was so hot, I fucked myself in the shower thinking about your voice.” 

“Was it good?” 

There was a slight pause, devoid of all tension. Emily’s smile was reverent, looking at JJ’s sparkling eyes and the way she shifted, full of curiosity. Poor thing had probably never been told someone had masturbated to her. 

“Yeah, it was pretty good. Second to only one fantasy I have.” 

“What’s that?” 

“You’ll need to get me drunker to figure that one out.” Emily winked at JJ, small smirk playing on her lips. 

——————

Hours later, JJ was guiding Emily down the hallway to the bedrooms, one hand firmly grasped around her arm. She was staggering, tripping over her own feet as the alcohol caught up to her. 

JJ stopped in front of the guest room, still holding Emily’s arm. She stared at the floor, lip worrying between her teeth as she tried to muster up the courage to say something. 

“I think I’ll sleep in my bedroom tonight.” 

Emily let out a long, drawn out sigh before running her hands through her messy hair. She rubbed at her face, whining softly before she looked up at JJ with pleading eyes. 

“Are you really gonna make me say it?” 

JJ nodded, edges of her lips quirking up in a smile she tried desperately to fight. 

“Fuck. Okay. I’m sorry I punched your ex boyfriend slash current baby daddy. Do you forgive me?” 

“Yes. Thank god, I can’t sleep alone.” 

Relief washed over JJ’s face as she practically dragged Emily to her bedroom. She shook out two little white pills onto Emily’s nightstand before getting into the bed with her. 

She curled up into Emily as she always did, soft smile on her lips as she let her head rest on Emily’s chest. The faint sound of her heartbeat was doing little to lull her to sleep, mind still racing at Emily’s earlier confession. 

“Hey, Em?” 

“Mm?” 

Emily was half asleep already, hand still running up and down JJ’s back soothingly as she always did. She looked so peaceful - so happy - and JJ almost felt bad to bother her, but she just had to know. 

“Did you really masturbate to my voice?” 

“Mm, yeah, it was so good. You’re so whiny and it was so hot. Thanks for that.” 

She felt her heart quicken at Emily’s words - she was sure she had been joking earlier, only poking fun at the fact that she had heard JJ in the showe but this? This was a full fledged confession. 

JJ felt herself grow wet at the thought, internally groaning. She was not getting wet for her best friend - absolutely not. No way. It couldn’t happen. 

“But —“ 

She was met with a loud snore from Emily, arms tightening around her body as she fell into a deeper sleep. 

Fuck. This was going to be a long night.


	6. I Get Off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JJ starts a fight with Emily. Mutual masturbation and some good old fashioned face sitting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi loves!
> 
> Okay, we’re getting smutty up in here. This chapter was supposed to end like, 4 times but I just kept writing. So enjoy it .   
> Any mistakes are totally mine because I rushed to post this haha. Anyways, enjoy and let me know what you think!

Emily sighed, hand running through her hair as she stared at the door. She had been waiting on JJ for hours, she was running “a quick errand” on the way home from work that turned into a four hour long endeavor. 

She had sent countless texts to her to be met with one response — “I’m fine, I’ll be home soon.” 

It wasn’t that she was worried - okay, fine, she was worried, and she was staying up to make sure JJ was okay. No matter how much she yawned and dozed off. 

Anger bubbled up in her chest but was quickly replaced with another feeling Emily couldn’t quite place. Protectiveness? Maybe that was it. She cared more for JJ now that they lived together, Emily reasoned with herself, she just wanted her to be safe. 

It felt like another hour had passed - it probably had - before she heard the mechanical turn of the lock, watched JJ sneak in with a guilty look on her face. Emily wanted to yell and scream and cry, but she settled for shooting JJ a disappointed look, her eyes narrowed and lips pursed into a thin, annoyed line. 

“Where have you been?” 

“Does it matter?” 

JJ’s tone was even, measured. She knew it did matter - that Emily was only concerned for her. The thought made her heart jump a little bit - to know she was so cared for - but she was itching for a fight. 

“Yes, Jen, it matters. I was worried sick… I wanted to know that you were alright is all.” 

“I’m fine. I’m not a damsel in distress, I’m an FBI agent… I can handle myself, you know that.” 

“I don’t know that.” 

Emily tried to shut it down, to stay quiet and not provoke a fight - but she couldn’t. She didn’t know why she cared so much, more than a friendly level, reasoned with herself that it was because JJ lived with her now and she was her best friend. She only wanted the best for her. 

“You’re not my mom. And you’re not my girlfriend, either! So why does it matter if I went to Will’s house?” 

There was a long pause between them and Emily felt the telltale prick of tears in her eyes. She turned away, downing the rest of her glass of wine before standing up, bringing her dishes to the sink. When she was confident she wouldn’t cry, she stopped in front of JJ, still standing in the doorway, and gave her a small, sad smile. 

“You know, I don’t know why it matters to me. Because I want to keep you safe, I guess.” She cocked her head, swallowing past the lump in her throat. “Anyways, your dinner is on the stove if you’re hungry. I’m going up to read.”

“Don’t wait up for me. I’ll be in my own room tonight.” 

“That’s alright. Goodnight, Jayje, sleep well.” 

Emily felt her heart shatter into a million pieces as she walked up the stairs, fighting to swallow back her tears and praying it didn’t manifest into rage. She hated being upset with JJ, but angry? She didn’t want to get to that point. 

She let out a long sigh, turning her bedroom television off and grabbing a book instead. This wasn’t the plan for the evening - she had selected a movie for them, bought fancy popcorn and nonalcoholic wine for JJ - she didn’t want to fight. 

After changing into her pajamas, she contemplated closing the door but ultimately decided to leave it open a sliver - just in case. Just in case JJ couldn’t sleep alone. Just in case she wanted to come to bed. 

A stubborn tear leaked down Emily’s face and she sighed, long and breathy and watery, before settling into the bed with her book. Her glasses were perched on her nose, trying desperately to focus on her book and not let her mind wander. She felt awful for making JJ upset, but she seriously couldn’t keep going to Will Last Resort. Not after he hurt her the way he did. 

She wasn’t sure how long she had been reading the same page over and over, mind wandering far away from the Dean Koontz novel she was attempting to read, but was brought from her thoughts by the soft pad of JJ’s feet up the hardwood steps. She stopped, hesitated in the hallway before Emily heard her bedroom door creak open and shut again. 

Emily set her book and glasses on her bedside table, turning onto her side and staring through the crack in her door. She could hear JJ shifting in her room, probably trying to get comfortable. The thought made Emily smirk - JJ was only punishing herself by sleeping alone. 

She knew she probably wouldn’t get much sleep, her bed felt too big and cold without JJ. Pulling the duvet up around her, she tried her best to calm her racing mind, ears still straining to hear any movement from JJ’s room. There was the rustling of blankets, the thud of feet kicking against the mattress and Emily smirked, just knowing JJ was frustrated and couldn’t get comfortable. Then, just barely audible, there was a soft moan. 

Oh. She was doing that. 

Emily nearly whined when she felt herself growing wet at the sounds JJ was making - for her benefit, probably. She didn’t want to fuck herself to her best friend’s voice, not after they fought. With a groan, Emily pulled a pillow over her face and tried to ignore it - to ignore JJ’s breathy moans, the throbbing between her own legs, and the hot flush spreading across her face. 

“I know what you’re doing, Jennifer.” 

“Don’t call me Jennifer.” She let out a low whine, and Emily could hear the blankets rustling even more. Seriously, why did she give JJ the bedroom closest to hers? 

“I can — oh my god, JJ, I can hear you in there.” Emily yelled, loud enough for JJ to hear in the other room. If she was just a bit quieter, Emily could focus and go to bed. 

“You started… oh, fuck—“ 

JJ’s response was punctuated by a whiny moan Emily just couldn’t ignore, throwing the pillow across the room and shimmying her pants and panties down. She tried to ignore the flush burning on her face in a mix of shame and arousal, hand sneaking down into the covers and between her legs. 

Her eyes fluttered when she slid two fingers inside of herself, slowly fucking into herself to the rhythm of JJ’s whines and pants. Emily brushed her thumb over her clit and let out a soft moan she tried her best to swallow back in fear of JJ knowing what she was doing. 

“Are — fuck, I’m so wet — are you still angry?” 

Emily let out a soft, shaky laugh. She tried to be nonchalant, but she could feel herself getting closer to the edge the more she listened to JJ. She didn’t want to answer - to feed into this ridiculous game JJ was playing - but something inside her felt so compelled.

“No. I’m not. I could never stay angry with you.” 

“Say it again. Say my name again.” 

JJ’s tone was punctuated with whines and whimpers and it was becoming increasingly hard for Emily to keep composed. She stifled a whimper of her own, biting down hard on her bottom lip as she hit just the right spot. 

“JJ?” 

“No. My name, Emily. The whole thing.” 

Emily was unable to stifle her whimper at JJ’s words, twisting and curling her fingers to JJ’s whines. God, why was she so hot when she whined like that? She could ignore JJ, pretend the walls between them dampened out her request, but her mouth was opening before she could think, spurred on by JJ’s intoxicating sounds. 

“Fuck, Jennifer, do you know what you’re even doing to me right now?” 

“Oh fuck, oh my god… Emily.” 

There was a sharp cry from down the hall and Emily just knew that JJ was coming apart as a result of her words. She quickened her movements, thumb brushing over her clit as she felt her walls flutter around her fingers. JJ’s whines and moans were borderline addictive, a particularly long gasp pushing Emily over the edge. 

She felt her palm fill with wetness as she came apart under her own fingers, letting out a loud moan. She didn’t have the first care as to who heard her, pulling her hand out from under the blankets and resting her hands on her chest, panting loudly. 

The hall light turned on and Emily heard JJ pad to the bathroom, the water running as she presumably cleaned herself up. Emily knew that she needed to get up and wash her hands at the very least, but her legs were still shaking, body twitching wildly. She had just experienced the single hottest moment of her life - and to her best friend’s voice, no less. 

She wasn’t sure how long she had laid there panting with an arm over her eyes, the gentle creak of her door breaking Emily from her thoughts. JJ was standing there, god damned blanket around her shoulders and wearing the most coy, cocky smile Emily had ever seen in her life. 

“What’s up?” She tried to sound nonchalant but there was absolutely nothing nonchalant about the situation, her chest still heaving and glistening fingers splayed across her stomach. 

“Did you listen to me the entire time?” JJ’s smile was coy and Emily swore this woman was going to be the death of her. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what you told me the other day.” 

“What was that?”

“That you fuck yourself to my voice.” 

JJ strode over to the bed, dropping the blanket on the floor and crawling up to Emily and oh god, Emily nearly passed out when she realized that JJ was wearing a sleep shirt and absolutely nothing else, save for the fuzzy pink socks. 

“I’m — Jayje, what the fuck?” 

There was no reply, JJ only leaning down and sucking Emily’s glistening fingers into her mouth. Emily was sure she had died and gone to a fresh gay hell, feeling herself grow wet again at the way JJ’s tongue swirled around her fingers. She was letting out the most sinful sounding whines and moans and god, Emily was sure she was going to combust. 

“I’m wet again, Em. You taste too good.” 

Fuck. Emily was wet now. She stared at JJ, dumbfounded by the insane turn of events. First she was mad and now she was sucking her fucking come off of her fingers? 

“Do you want to um, sit on my face? Or I can uh, help you out?” 

JJ looked shy, bottom lip ensnared between her teeth as she cocked her head, searching Emily’s expression for some sort of hint. 

“You’ve never been with a woman before.” 

“Have too! I was a soccer player in college.” 

“Okay, you’ve never had kinky sex with a woman before. Climb up, let me show you how it’s done.” 

JJ tentatively settled over Emily’s face, hands braced on the headboard. She let out a small gasp when Emily tugged her hips further into her mouth, turning into a moan when Emily licked a line up her cunt to focus on her clit. 

“Jayje, you taste so good, holy shit you’re soaked.” 

Emily was nearly euphoric, soaked at just the taste of JJ. She was writhing, hips gliding across Emily’s face and god, if Emily glanced up she could see right under JJ’s shirt. She looked like she was enjoying herself, head thrown forward and hands braced on the headboard, squeezing so hard her knuckles were turning white. 

“God, you’re so good. Fuck, you feel so good.” 

She felt a flood of wetness at JJ’s words combined with the way her hips moved desperately against her mouth. She pulled back, fingers scraping at JJ’s inner thighs, a smirk tugging at the corners of her lips when she felt the muscles under her fingertips quake. 

“I never thought I’d be into that but god, it’s really doing it for me right now.” 

Emily’s hands were firm on JJ’s hips, holding her in place while she lapped at her folds. She sucked her clit into her mouth, enjoying the long drawn out moan JJ let out, wiggling her hips in desperation. 

“Fuck fuck fuck, Em. How are you so fucking good at that? Holy shit. I’m so close, god, your mouth is fucking wonderful.” 

Emily felt lightheaded when JJ spoke, a rush of arousal making her thighs sticky again. God, this woman was going to be the death of her. She redoubled her effort, mouth latching around JJ’s clit and fingers stroking her inner thighs, delighted in the whimpers and moans she let out. 

“Oh, god, Em.” JJ sighed out, her hips beginning to cant up to meet Emily’s tongue. “God, you’re so good. You’re such a good girl.” 

At JJ’s words, Emily felt herself clenching around nothing, hips jerking as she fell over the edge into her second orgasm of the night. She slid two fingers to toy with JJ’s cunt, fingers pressing inside her just barely enough to tease, but enough to push her over the edge. 

“God, fuck, Em… I’m coming. Fuck. You’re so good. You did so good.” 

JJ was whining, hips rolling against Emily’s mouth as she came down from her high, inner thighs shaking as her chest heaved with labored breath. She looked down at Emily, smiling reverently before she lifted herself up and laid beside her, hand coming up to stroke back her overgrown, unruly bangs. 

Emily looked absolutely destroyed, face glistening with JJ’s leftover wetness and red in the cheeks. She was smiling so wide, eyes droopy and exhausted, looking into JJ’s sparkling eyes with such sincerity and honesty it made JJ’s heart clench a little bit. 

She felt awful for being so mad at Emily, but she had ignored every attempt at JJ’s advances and she couldn’t get the image of Emily fucking herself out of her head. She ran her thumb through the wetness on Emily’s cheek, a smirk creeping up on her face. 

“Poor thing, you probably need to come, don’t you?” 

“No, I can very honestly say I was right there with you.” There was a soft flush forming on Emily’s cheeks at the admission, but she didn’t look away. 

“Without being touched? Hot.” JJ smirked, running her fingertips down Emily’s forearms. “Let me clean your face off?” 

Emily nodded, letting out a surprised gasp when JJ’s mouth made contact with her cheeks, kissing and licking along her face, tongue gathering the wetness she had left. It was the last thing she had expected from JJ, but somehow she managed to surprise her a little bit every day nowadays. 

Without a word, JJ crawled under the covers between Emily’s legs, fingers reverently stroking her sticky inner thighs. Emily stroked at JJ’s hair before pulling the blankets back and tugging her head up to look at her. 

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” 

“Trust me, Em, I want to - more than anything.” 

“Oh my god.” 

Emily could barely form a coherent thought when JJ’s mouth made connection with her cunt, tongue licking a line up to her clit. She gasped, tugging gently on JJ’s hair and bucking her hips up and seriously, for someone with little to no experience with women she was good. Better than good, really. 

“God, you taste so good. I could stay down here forever.” 

Her words made Emily whine, hips stuttering up into JJ’s mouth. It was embarrassing how close she already was but fuck, JJ was a goddess with her mouth and her words. She brought a hand up to tug at her own hair, hissing when JJ’s fingernails dug into her inner thighs. 

“Jen… fuck, I’m so close. I’m sorry, god, you’re so good with your tongue.” 

JJ let out a ghost of a laugh into Emily’s clit, the cool air making her hips cant up into JJ’s mouth again. She was so close it was almost embarrassing, but Emily couldn’t bring herself to care. 

“God, fuck. How the fuck are you so good at this?” 

“I just am.” She stopped for a moment, fingernails digging into Emily’s thighs and eliciting a keening whine. “Come for me, Em. You’re such a good girl. You can come now, god, I need to watch you fall apart.” 

Emily let out a long, drawn out moan as she fell over the edge, fucking up into JJ’s mouth and pulling her hair tightly, blonde locks wound around her fingers as her hips jerked and stuttered. JJ’s mouth was near sinful, tongue wrapping around her clit in a way that Emily had never felt before - and fuck, she had been eaten out by lots of men and women over the years. 

As she came down from her high, JJ crawled up her body and settled on her chest, one hand playing with Emily’s hair idly. She watched carefully as Emily’s eyes fluttered open, a small, shy smile on her face. 

JJ’s heart clenched in that moment because, god, Emily was fucking radiant. She was impossibly more gorgeous, hair splayed out and covered in a thin sheen of sweat. Her chest was still heaving, eyes sparkling as she just stared into JJ’s eyes. 

“Thank you for that. You really didn’t have to but fuck, it was so good.” 

“No, thank you.” JJ chuckled, head coming to rest in the spot on Emily’s chest where it fit just perfectly. “I wasn’t really mad at you. I know you care about me. I just wanted to start a fight because I’m hormonal.” 

There was a moment of silence between them, JJ afraid that she truly upset Emily. After a moment, Emily let out a breathy laugh, hand coming up to gently stroke back JJ’s hair. 

“Fuck, thanks for that. I cried, Jayje! I fucking cried. Asshole.” 

“I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.”


	7. No One Likes A Mad Woman (You Made Her Like That)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is Will finally gone? We’ll see.
> 
> I suck at chapter summaries!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!   
> So lowkey still sad about that crappy mean review I got so whatever - I’m posting this Absolute Trash dumpster fire of a chapter anyways.   
> I would really appreciate it if you GENTLY let me know what you think. Don’t mind if I rip your hearts out tonight ;)

The walls shook with the force behind the slamming door, JJ stomping in and kicking her shoes across the foyer. She let out a loud shriek, hands pulling at her hair angrily. 

“Em? Where are you?” 

“Kitchen.” 

Emily was mixing the last ingredients into the cake batter, apron wrapped around her waist and flour dusting the ends of her dark hair. She scratched at her nose with the back of her hand, waiting for JJ to come in. 

“What’s up?” 

“What’s up? What’s up is I need you to help me pack my things.” JJ hoisted herself up to sit on the counter, dipping her pinkie into the cake batter and tasting it. “That’s good, by the way.” 

Emily smiled in thanks, but her heart was hammering in her chest. What did JJ mean by packing up her things? After the night they just had and they way she had acted… Emily had been so sure JJ was into it. She felt her heart sink but faked her best smile, a glassy ghost of what she was truly feeling. 

Thank god for all the practice she had growing up. 

“So you’re going back to Will?” 

“Oh my god, no! You’re helping me pack my things to bring them… I don’t know where! But not with him. He’s such an… ugh! Give me another lick of that.” 

Emily smirked, pouring the batter into the pan and handing JJ the mixing bowl and spoon. She put the cake in the oven and set the timer before getting out the ingredients for the icing, a small frown on her face. 

“There, bowl’s all yours. So, what happened with Will?” 

JJ held up a finger, bringing the chocolate covered spoon to her mouth and licking it clean. She let out a little moan and Emily nearly died, turning away when she felt the telltale burn of a blush creeping up on her cheeks. 

“Okay. So.” JJ sighed, letting out a low groan before speaking again. “He had to have surgery on his mouth because someone packs a punch and he broke two teeth.” 

“Sorry.” Emily grinned sheepishly, her blush only burning brighter. 

She leaned on the counter across from JJ, arms folded across her chest as she watched her lick the spoon again. A small smile tugged on her lips, head cocked as she watched JJ talk, eyes fixated on her lips. 

“Oh, it’s really no problem because I get there and guess what? I walk in and there’s this other woman sitting on the bed with her arms around him. And he’s kissing her! Emily, he was kissing her!” 

Emily’s eyebrows shot up, disappearing into her bangs as she studied JJ’s face for a reaction. She felt the familiar bubble of anger start to form in her chest. After everything with Will, she learned that nothing incited a rage inside of her quite like when he did something to JJ. 

“And what did you say?” 

“I said a lot.” JJ sighed, paused for a moment to gather the last lick of batter out of the bowl. “But I found out she’s been seeing him for a year. Twelve fucking months, Em. I got the new keys and I’m supposed to get my stuff. God, I don’t know where I’m going to put it all.” 

“We’ll move it all here. I’m serious, you’re not getting another place by yourself and pregnant.” 

“I’m not handicapped.” 

“I know.” 

Emily let out a long sigh, feeling the familiar shake in her chest from pure, unrestrained anger. She wanted to do a lot more than break Will Laball-licker’s teeth - she wanted to watch him suffer. With a small noise of anger and acknowledgement, she shook her head before looking pointedly at JJ.

“So, you agree to stay here?” 

“Yeah, I guess. I don’t want to —“ 

“You’re not. You’re not doing whatever you think you are. I like having you here, Jayje.” 

There was a beat of silence between them, Emily’s eyes narrowed in a pointed look that JJ tried her hardest not to laugh at. Her lips quirked up in a smile, uncontrollable and goofy, before she broke out into loud gulps of laughter at Emily’s ridiculous facial expression. 

“Good. Now that we have that settled I’m going to call about a U-Haul.” 

——————

“Jayje, sit down. You’re pregnant.” 

The only response Emily got was a narrowing of JJ’s eyes before she dropped the box she was carrying, stalking through the house. She could tell that JJ was fighting the urge to smile behind her grimace, heart flopping at the way the corners of her lips twitched. 

Emily shook her head, carrying another box to the growing pile at the front door. She was beginning to wish she had taken Morgan up on his offer to help, but she thought it would be less traumatic and sad for JJ if it was just them, sorting out the remains of a relationship that was apparently doomed from the start. 

She worked in silence for a few more minutes, shuttling JJ’s pre-packed boxes to the front door before she was disrupted by a series of crashes. Thinking the worst, Emily jogged to the kitchen, skidding to a stop in the doorway when she saw what was happening. 

There were tears streaming down JJ’s face as she crashed wine glasses into the sink, one hand over her eyes as they broke apart. Emily grabbed her free hand, tugging her into a tight hug, wrenching the unbroken wine glass out of JJ’s other hand. 

“Hey. Stop. JJ, come here.” 

“Emily…” 

Her voice was sad and broken, tears making her sound so distant, so small compared to her usual self. Emily held her, fingers running through tangled blonde hair as she shushed her, hand rubbing circles on the small of her back. 

“He cheated, this whole time he was cheating on me. That’s why he didn’t want this baby.” 

“I — fuck, JJ, I’m so sorry. But if it makes you feel any better, I want this baby.” 

“Thank you, Em. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.” 

JJ pulled back, stretching up and kissing Emily on the cheek before moving to the cabinets and picking out her mugs to pack into a box. She hummed some song Emily didn’t recognize while she worked, on her toes and reaching for something on the top shelf and fuck, Emily almost passed out when a tiny sliver of skin peeked out from between JJ’s shirt and shorts. 

She shook her head, trying to clear her mind and resist the temptation to touch her cheek that was tingling from JJ’s lips. Emily’s heart was hammering in her chest and she tried to make it stop, to stop feeling whatever sort of attraction this was because — no, absolutely not. She was helping JJ pack up the remains of her relationship with Will, it wasn’t the time or place. 

“What are you doing?” 

Emily jumped at JJ’s soft voice, eyes wide and clapping her hand to her chest. She laughed, shaky and nervous before getting up to carry some boxes to the door, throwing a smile over her shoulder. 

“I was zoned out, sorry. Just thinking about how much I hate Will.” 

There was an awkward pause, Emily moving through the house and carrying boxes to the U-Haul as JJ worked on packing the remnants of her life with Will into cardboard. Emily felt her heart clench when she saw the empty walls and the pile of pictures JJ had ripped in half. 

“Hey Em?” 

“Mm?” She was sorting through a box of paperwork, plucking out anything that belonged to JJ or looked particularly interesting. 

“Can we go back to what you said about wanting this baby?” 

Emily felt herself turning bright red, flush burning at her cheeks. Her heart hammered in her chest, wheels turning in her head as she searched for some sort of answer that didn’t sound so desperate. 

“I meant what I said and I’m not elaborating.” 

“Okay. I can deal with that.” 

JJ smiled, looking down at Emily with her beautiful, sparkling blue eyes and god, anything that woman wanted Emily would have done or bought. She was intoxicating, the way her lips curved up in that crooked little smile as she watched Emily, just watched her like she was the most magnificent thing she had ever seen. 

She was everything that Emily wanted and could never have, and the thought made her throat tighten with the beginnings of tears that she pushed away until a later date. She was good at that after years of living under her mother’s thumb. Old habits die hard and Emily was never so thankful. 

And yet, she was the best friend JJ had ever had. 

Emily felt her heart clench, trying to focus on the papers she was going through but she couldn’t - not with JJ looking down at her like that. She shoved the stack in the box she was packing because, really, fuck Will. If he needed something from JJ he could beg her for all Emily cared. 

“Stop staring at me, Jen. You’re making me squirm.” 

There was a small pause, JJ’s lips quirking into a sly smirk as she thought. She laughed, something gravely in a way that wasn’t emotion, no, that was pure fucking lust and Emily felt a shiver down her spine at the sound. 

“Then come on, let’s finish up so we can go home. I want to see how many other ways I can make you squirm.”


	8. The Spark In Your Eyes, The Look On Your Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honestly this is just sweet pining smut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi friends! 
> 
> This is another smut chapter. The pining is just so SOFT.   
> If you like what you read, lemme know! I always appreciate knowing your favorite lines. 
> 
> PS: this chap is set to “Twin Sized Mattress” by The Front Bottoms

The drive home was absolutely maddening to Emily with JJ’s hand placed on her inner thigh as she tried to keep the truck straight and not end up in a ditch. Her fingers were long and thin, a blush coloring Emily’s face when she glanced down and looked at her hand, sinful thoughts of the previous night rushing back to her. 

“You’re on edge.” 

“If you move your hand any higher I’m going to crash this truck, Jennifer.” 

She laughed - light and lilting and the sound made Emily’s heart clench, an honest to god stutter in her heart - and god, she could light up a room with her bright blue sparkly eyes and that smile. 

Emily tried to swallow back the pure adoration she felt but it gave way to arousal, entirely too focused on the way JJ’s fingers felt trailing up and down her inner thighs. Her cheeks and chest were burning, bright red and she was holding her breath until she saw spots, JJ’s hand entirely too distracting as she drove. 

When she turned the truck onto her street she nearly cheered, spread her legs a little wider for JJ. Emily was smirking, eyes focused on the road and trying her best to act nonchalant. In all truth, she couldn’t, not with JJ’s fingers creeping higher on her thighs and scratching at the coarse material of her jeans. 

“We’re —“ Emily stopped, cleared her throat as she backed the truck into the driveway. “We’re home. Welcome home.” 

She cursed herself internally at how entirely gay that sounded. Thank god her cheeks were already aflame with a crimson blush akin to the color of her tank top, because if they hadn’t been, she’d be blushing again. 

“Take me inside?” 

What the fuck? 

Emily felt her head spin at JJ’s words, laced with lust and another emotion she couldn’t quite place. She looked at her and fuck, Emily could have died right there. JJ was biting her lip, pupils blown and eyes shining with something entirely erotic. 

God, Emily would have done anything for JJ if she just smiled at her like that forever. 

“Em.” She brought her hand up to cup Emily’s face. “Take me inside? Unless you want to unpack the truck first.” 

She nearly short circuited at JJ’s implication, the way she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. Her lip was still worrying between her teeth in a way that was a mixture of sexy and adorable and seriously, how could she get Emily wetter than she already was? 

“No!” She laughed, shaky and exhaled under a breath. “I mean no, we have the truck until tomorrow afternoon. I think we should go inside.” 

“To rest?”

Emily jumped out of the truck, shaking her head at JJ’s antics and partly in response to her question. She came around to JJ’s door, opening it for her and helping her down. She pressed a gentle kiss to the back of JJ’s hand before jogging up the front steps and unlocking the door. 

“Something about leaving him… coming to you… god, Emily, I’m so turned on.” 

“It’s the hormones, Jen.”

When JJ’s lips attached to her neck, biting and sucking, Emily thought she was going to explode. She stifled a moan, hands gripping at JJ’s shirt and stumbling backwards into the house. The door was left stood open, blinking lights of the U-Haul shining into the house and fuck, it made Emily’s heart skip a beat. 

She nudged JJ into a seated position on the couch, pulling her shorts down and kneeling between her legs. The sound of JJ’s breath catching was enough to flood her panties, but the way she squirmed to the edge of her seat and leaned back was enough to destroy her. 

“I’ve never been so wet before.” 

“You finally had a good orgasm, I get why you crave it now.” 

“It’s the baby, not me.” 

Emily let out a laugh, breathy and soft, marveling in the way JJ shivered under her. She licked a long line up JJ’s cunt, moaning softly at the taste and the way JJ’s hand wound in her hair instinctively. 

She glanced up and her heart honest to god skipped a beat. JJ’s hair was fanned out on the back of the couch, head thrown back in pleasure and fuck, even with her shirt on Emily could see the outline of her nipples. And that stomach. The swell was barely there, hidden underneath toned abs and Emily knew, she just knew, and it made her feel like mush inside. 

With a soft sigh, she pushed two fingers inside of JJ, relishing in the soft sigh she let out. Content, happy, pleased. There was the sound of a car driving down the road and they both moaned, Emily into JJ’s clit and earning a sharp tug of her hair. 

She couldn’t help herself from snaking her free hand down into her jeans, JJ’s moans and whimpers had her entirely too wet and wanting. Emily continued to pump her fingers in and out of JJ while she lapped at her clit, paying special attention to the spot that made her legs quake. 

“God, Em, you’re so fucking good.” 

JJ’s walls began to clench around her fingers, and god, Emily nearly lost it at that alone. She was fumbling between her own legs with her left hand, not nearly as deft and practiced with it but with JJ’s moans and whimpers, she barely needed any stimulation at all. 

The moans JJ was letting out were sinful, but the way she was rolling her hips up into Emily’s mouth was borderline pornographic. Emily made the mistake of glancing up and fuck, the sight alone was enough to make her clench around her own fingers. 

JJ was gorgeous - unguarded and beautiful in every way. Her eyes were screwed shut, slack jawed and head tilted back with one hand in her own hair. She looked like a picture, the blinking red and orange lights from the U-Haul shining in through the open door painting her in the most beautiful light. 

Her thighs were shaking, clamping around Emily’s head and fuck, the door was open and it added so much thrill to it Emily could barely stand it. She curled her fingers just right, reveled in the way JJ’s voice sounded so gravely and strained as she hissed out a curse. 

“Emily, god damn, you’re fucking fantastic with that tongue.” 

She moaned, vibrating JJ’s clit and god, the way her legs shook and the moans she let out could be Emily’s new religion. She curled her fingers, pushing JJ over the edge and straight into her orgasm, writhing and fucking her hips up into Emily’s mouth. 

It was intoxicating, Emily’s tongue still working at JJ’s clit and helping her ride out her orgasm, spurred on by the little mewls and sighs she was letting out. And god, she was the most gorgeous thing Emily had ever seen, her face contorted into a look of pure bliss that was so captivating, Emily found herself coming at the sight, fucking into herself hard and fast. 

“Oh my god, Em, stop. I’m too sensitive.” 

JJ was giggling, pushing gently at Emily’s head and guiding her to rest her head on her thigh, stroking her hair back and smiling down with the most angelic, blissful smile. She looked happy - truly happy, shook to her core from her orgasm and a hint of something else. 

“Was it good?” Emily could barely recognize her own voice, breathy and gravely and so hoarse. She cleared her throat and pulled her hand out of her jeans, resting her cheek on JJ’s milky thigh and pressing a soft kiss to the skin she found there. 

JJ squirmed, stroked her cheek with her thumb and god, Emily nearly melted into her touch. Another car zoomed down the street and brought them both from their trance, blushing as they pulled apart, Emily helping JJ wiggle back into her shorts. 

“Did you need me to help you out? My legs are still jello, you deserve some repayment.” 

Emily blushed, eyes trained on her shoes as she shuffled from foot to foot. With a laugh she looked up at JJ, a lopsided half smile on her face. 

“Oh Jen, no, I was right there with you. Hand in my pants the entire time.” 

“With your left hand?” 

“With my left hand.” 

“You amaze me, woman.” 

JJ laughed, hand coming up to cup Emily’s face again, thumb stroking across the soft skin of her cheek before fixing her hair, pushing her bangs back into place. She felt her heart flop at the way the corners of Emily’s mouth still glistened with her arousal, the way Emily didn’t care and licked her lips anyways. 

There was the loud sound of a horn, Garcia’s car pulling up into the driveway. She was waving wildly and Emily and JJ both laughed at her ridiculousness - they weren’t sure what was funnier, the ridiculous wave she was giving them or the fact that her car was nearly covered in cat and unicorn themed stickers. They pulled apart, a small pout on Emily’s lips that was quickly shushed by JJ. 

“Stop. She’s only here to help and we have all night together.” 

The thought made Emily’s heart clench, even though she knew it wasn’t meant in the way she was hoping. God, Emily was falling for her straight, pregnant best friend and there wasn’t a single thing she could do to stop it. 

“Hello, my fine feathered friends! I hear someone needs help unpacking their U-Haul because someone else is pregnant? Why is the door open? Why are you both blushing? Never mind, Auntie Penelope is here to save the day!” 

Garcia pushed her way into the house, dropping her purse on the front table before walking to the kitchen and rifling through Emily’s fridge. It made her laugh to know that her friends felt so at home with her - a stark contrast to how she felt with them at times. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust them, she just didn’t know how to let her guard down. 

JJ was trying her best to follow Garcia into the kitchen, thighs still shaking. She grabbed Emily’s elbow, letting out a breathy laugh as she walked like she had been rendered immobile. 

“What’s wrong with you, Jayje? Is it the baby? Is he or she draining your energy already? Come, sit.” 

Garcia pulled out a chair for JJ, Emily guiding her down into it and tossing her a bottle of water. If Garcia noticed the crimson blushes on both of their faces, she didn’t say anything and Emily had never been more thankful.


	9. Three Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will had done exactly what Emily warned her he would do, told her he was coming and canceled a little under an hour before the appointment. The way he treated JJ and their unborn child never failed to fill Emily with a seething anger, heart racing and breath quickening at only the thought of him. She had to suppress a smile at the memory of the sickening crack when her fist connected with his face, easily one of the proudest moments of her adult life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh hi I’m back, after the longest hiatus ever lol 
> 
> hope u all love it!! xo

Fuck Will. 

Fuck Will for being the deadbeat father she knew he was going to be, for stringing JJ along and never following through. Emily tapped her fingers impatiently against the steering wheel, stuck in bumper to bumper traffic — just her luck as she was trying to race across town to get to JJ before the sonogram, Will having stood her up. 

She was so angry when JJ declined her offer to go with her in favor of Will, couldn’t describe the crushing hurt she felt. She tried to remind herself that she and JJ were nothing — not in a romantic way, at least, despite the stirring feelings she had been feeling for the other woman since she had moved in. 

Another car cut her off and Emily slammed on the horn, yelling an obscenity out the window. She took a deep breath, remembered how sad and scared JJ sounded when she called, begging Emily to come to the sonogram only thirty minutes before her appointment. 

Will had done exactly what Emily warned her he would do, told her he was coming and canceled a little under an hour before the appointment. The way he treated JJ and their unborn child never failed to fill Emily with a seething anger, heart racing and breath quickening at only the thought of him. She had to suppress a smile at the memory of the sickening crack when her fist connected with his face, easily one of the proudest moments of her adult life. 

She swung her car into a space in front of the doctor’s office before jumping out and hastily shoving quarters into the parking meter. Emily took the stairs two at a time, burst into the waiting room and noticed that JJ wasn’t there, having already been taken back to an exam room. Her heart sped up at the thought of missing the appointment — of letting JJ down. 

“Can I help you?” The receptionist directed a warm smile towards Emily, looked over her glasses at her and back to the computer screen. “First appointment?” 

“I’m here for JJ — Jennifer Jareau.” Her words came out in a rush, heart still pounding and hands fidgeting. 

The woman’s eyes lit up in understanding, nodding quickly as though she knew something before writing on a visitor’s badge for Emily. She handed it over, a knowing smile on her face as she watched Emily affix the sticker on her shirt. 

“Your wife told me you’d be coming, said you’d probably be right on time. She’s through that door and in the first room on the left.” 

“My — thank you.” 

Emily couldn’t help the way her face heated up in a red hot blush at the way the receptionist said JJ was her wife. She knew it wasn’t anything they had done or said — most people don’t take their friend to the first sonogram after their ex-boyfriend cancels — but the implication still filled Emily’s stomach with a nervous flutter. She knocked on the exam room door, waited for a soft murmur from the technician before she opened the door slowly, stepping inside and shutting it behind her. 

The sight of JJ reclined on the bed, towel thrown over her stomach made Emily’s stomach flip worse than it already was — her bright blue eyes wide and filled with nervous excitement. She barely registered the technician making a joke about showing up in the nick of time, smiled politely as she watched JJ mouth a silent thank you, her lips curling up into a wide grin. 

“Are you guys ready to see your baby?” 

Emily nodded hesitantly, stood dutifully at JJ’s side and let her fingertips graze her shoulder. She couldn’t look away from the blue of her eyes — the way her lips were still twitching up into a smile despite every tell that she was trying to fight it, trying to be as serious as possible. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the subtle swell of JJ’s stomach when the ultrasound technician removed the towel and squirted the gel onto her stomach, letting out a breathy laugh when JJ jumped at the temperature of the gel. 

The small bump made her heart flutter, eyes transfixed on the slightly tanned skin, mind racing with all of the possibilities for the future — visions of an infant cooing in a crib while JJ looked down and sang. She felt a pang in her chest when she reminded herself that no, that may not be the life JJ wanted to give her child — and it was just that, hers, and not Emily’s. She was brought from her thoughts when JJ reached up, fingers wiggling until Emily grasped her hand and she visibly relaxed, only to tense up again when the technician pressed the wand to her gel covered stomach. 

They both stared at the dark screen, eyes transfixed on the grey and black static until it finally focused — a little gummy bear of a baby jumping around on the screen. JJ let out a delighted gasp, lips curled into a grin as Emily wiped tears from her face. She hadn’t expected to be so affected by the image, but she already loved this little baby so much it hurt. 

“There you go, mommies… there’s your baby.” 

“Oh I’m not…” Emily started, hastily wiping at the tears that were rapidly falling down her face. 

She wasn’t a mother, this wasn’t her baby — hell, JJ wasn’t even her girlfriend, merely a friend that lived with her and fell into her bed occasionally. A roommate, and she had already reasoned with herself that she would be beyond lucky to be able to co-parent and cohabitate with JJ and the baby at best — knew it may not be a likely scenario and didn’t want to get her hopes up, despite the excited flutter in her stomach she felt when she let herself sit and think about it for too long. 

“Shut up. You’re mom too.” 

“You guys make a great couple, I can already tell you’re going to be amazing parents.” The technician tapped at the keyboard before moving the wand around, pressing down on another spot. “I just have to grab a few more…” 

“Take your time.” 

JJ meant what she said — would have been content to sit there all afternoon and watch both the bouncing baby on the screen and the light in Emily’s eyes as she stared, completely transfixed by the image. It was a look JJ couldn’t quite decipher — love, she could tell, but a bit of something else that made her heart flutter and stomach flip. It was the same feeling she got when Emily’s fingers grazed hers in the car on the way to work, the giddy happiness in the pit of her stomach that no one else seemed to ignite. 

“And I’ve got it. Thanks for being so patient with me, ladies.” The ultrasound technician pulled the wand from JJ’s stomach, wiping it clean before handing Emily a towel to clean the gel and a sheet of pictures. “I think that’s all for today… when you get cleaned up you can just check out and book your next appointment.” 

They both murmured out a thanks as the technician stepped out of the room, Emily already wiping gently at JJ’s stomach and cleaning the gel off. It was like there was a trance between them — neither able to speak or look at each other, only the slight protrusion of JJ’s stomach as it really settled in that there was, in fact, a tiny baby growing inside of her. 

“Emily…” JJ’s fingers grazed Emily’s wrist gently, looked up at her face and waited for their eyes to make contact before continuing. “Thank you. For everything… for coming, for doing this with me.” 

“Jayje, you don’t even have to ask, you know I’ll always…” 

“I meant it.” 

“You — what…?” 

There was a pause between them as Emily tried to decipher what JJ meant by her statement. Her eyebrows were knit together in a look of confusion, eyes half squinted in a way that made JJ let out a soft, airy laugh. After a moment, she reached up and let her thumb graze Emily’s cheek, smiling gently at her. 

“Meant that you’re mom too, we’re doing this together… if you want to?” 

It was a loaded question and they both knew it, and this wasn’t the place to have that sort of conversation. Emily knew she wanted to — wanted to raise this baby with JJ more than she had ever wanted anything, so badly that it scared her a little bit — but rationalized with herself that they should probably sit down over lunch and discuss it. 

“We need to leave before they send another patient in.” She noticed the way JJ’s face fell, pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head before pulling her shirt down over her stomach and gently patting the bump. “Hey, this isn’t a no, it’s a we’re not having this conversation in this doctor’s office because I’ll cry. Come on, we both have the rest of the day off… I have plans for us.” 

“Plans?” 

JJ hopped off the table, letting her hand bump against Emily’s until she got the hint and laced their fingers together — fell into step beside her as they rounded the corner and walked to the checkout counter. They were understaffed for as many patients as they had, receptionists bustling around the circular desk as they tried to tend to everyone at once. Emily waved her wrist, signaled to them that they could take as long as they needed, before turning to JJ with a slight smile. 

“I may have reserved a table at Olive Garden for us, and it’s right by this darling baby boutique I found on Facebook.” 

She watched as JJ’s eyes lit up to that sparkling, shiny blue she adored so much, the way her smile reached her eyes and wrinkled her nose. It was endearing, the way her entire body seemed to thrum with every emotion, from the good to the bad, always feeling so deeply, so purely. Emily found herself hoping that the same energy — the same ability to feel so truly — would be passed on to the baby dancing about in her stomach. 

“How do you always manage to make bad days better?” 

“I just do, I guess.” 

A receptionist hurried over to where they were standing, breaking them from their trance and snapping them back into the real world — a world where more existed than just the energy between the two of them. Emily couldn’t tear her gaze away from JJ’s subtle smile as she spoke to the woman, nodding enthusiastically, a few strands of shorter hair falling from her ponytail and shaking into her face. 

JJ slipped the appointment card in her pocket as they walked out, entering the elevator hand in hand with giddy smiles on their faces. She almost hated the fact that they drove separately, wished she could sit beside Emily and bask in the happiness she was feeling, just be with her and present in the moment. There was never pressure with her — never any pressure to be more than she wanted to be, to carry on conversation when words seemed too hard — always content to just exist together. 

Outside of the office, too many eyes on them, Emily found herself able to let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. She let herself look at JJ — truly look at her, the way her eyes were still shining and cheeks pinkened in what could only be described as a glow. The way her hair was falling in her face, having been shook free from the confines of her ponytail, was endearing — and Emily found herself gazing deep into JJ’s eyes as her fingers gently brushed the hair back out of her face. 

The metallic grind of the elevator doors opening broke them from the moment, from their lips slowly gravitating towards each other as though pulled by magnetic force. They laughed, straightening up and walking out of the elevator, Emily’s hand on the small of JJ’s back as she guided her to her car just a few spaces away from her own. 

“Follow me to the restaurant?” 

“I’d follow you anywhere, Emily Prentiss.”


End file.
